I just left these two, after way too much giggling and way past their bedtime. It's Friday night, and they were deep in a new handshake bonding moment, and I just couldn't cut it short.
God had a way different plan than I did when it came to these two. I was an emotional wreck when I found out I was pregnant with Trey. Jack had been a big adjustment for me, and I still didn't have him figured out six months into motherhood. He was fussy, didn't sleep, and had way too many doctor appointments in his little life already. Our little family was living in a tiny apartment in Lafayette, waiting for our out-of-town house to sell. Six months had gone by with no luck. And I was feeling cramped, in more ways than one.
And then I took a pregnancy test (holding a fussy baby in one arm and the stick in the other!) that changed my life forever. And I cried hard. For about four months. Looking back, I don't think I doubted God as much as I doubted my own ability. Hmm... but that's still doubting God, isn't it?
Because He's the only One who has the power to work out the details anyway.
Oh, there were details alright.
Sleepless nights for months on end. Nursing a baby in one arm while reading to a toddler in the other. Protecting an infant from a very energetic one year old. Feeling sweaty all of the time with two babies constantly on me. Making it to church on time - or anywhere for that matter - with the boys when Tyler worked. And when he didn't. And making it through a sermon without getting paged to the nursery? Well, that didn't happen for a long time.
But I left their bedroom tonight almost in tears from laughing so hard. They were made for each other. Polar opposites, but the best buddies ever. Tighter than tight. Inseparable. Friends.
And I thanked God for giving me these two so close together. It took some hard work initially, and ultimately a lot of trusting in the One who always knows what's best for us.
But man, is it paying off.
God knew what He was doing.
But then, HE always does, doesn't He?
2 comments:
Aw, Whitney, this post brought tears to my eyes. Yes, God does always know what he's doing, but it's tough to believe that in the middle of it all. Thanks for sharing.
That made me cry! My girls are 21 months apart and when they were small, I was so overwhelmed. Now they are 7 and almost 9. I feel as if I had wished some of my time away praying it would be easier when they got older. I knew that had I not breastfed Addy, I never would have held her because I was so busy chasing after a 21 month old girl and a 5 year old boy. But it all worked out. The Lord had faith in my mothering abilities and I am ashamed that I ever doubted Him.
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