All Dressed Up...

We don't celebrate Halloween. Or do we? Chase asked what there is to celebrate, and Trey told him that we celebrate getting candy. Sounds good to me.

And you need to know that there is a slight obsession with dressing up in our house. Not just on Halloween, but practically every day of the year. Our dress up bins are filled to the brim, and we like it that way. When Tess was born, the boys were so glad that she was a girl so they could finally add Tinkerbell to their cast. It's serious stuff when you play Peter Pan and there is no Tink. This boy needs to be an actor. Or maybe a youth pastor. I would like that. Or a car salesman. Something that puts all of that drama to work... I love this picture. Doesn't it look like it's out of a Pottery Barn magazine or something? Except for the fact that we pulled two outfits - already owned for quite some time - straight out of our dress up bin, and not purchased online for some insane amount of money. Pottery Barn magazines are not all bad, though. I'm getting quite skilled at flipping through them and getting all kinds of sweet ideas, only to replicate them at the clearance end-caps at Target. I'll have you know that my handsome husband chose to wear that puffer vest completely on his own tonight. See, I am rubbing off on him. :)

She really did have a good time... completely content to ride in the stroller and watch the boys go from house to house. She and I ended up heading back a bit early to the house to greet some of our own Trick-or-Treaters. The highlight of the night: when she spontaneously embraced Spiderman (another two year old, who was a complete stranger) for like two minutes straight. Counting the loot! Tyler is proud of our cute little tradition that he started: each kid writes in Sharpie on their plastic pumpkin their candy total for the year. So it looks something like this:

Jack - 2010 - 100 pieces.

Official totals for this year... Jack - 100, Trey - 101, Chase - 105, Tess - 2

I'd say in some small, happy way, that's reason to celebrate. :)

V-i-c-t-o-r-y

Yes, I am training my two year old "mommy" to capture precious moments... on the potty. It's a normal practice around here. You know you do it too. After all those years of changing diapers, you take pictures of your kids learning to use the potty. Not just because it's cute (even though it is). But because it spells V-i-c-t-o-r-y. And since there are so many days when we as moms feel less than victorious, we'll capture anything and everything that slightly resembles success. She's been potty trained since August, and it still feels surreal when I look at her cute little bottom in those pink Hello Kitty undies. Partly because she's wearing undies and not a diaper, and partly because they're Hello Kitty and not Spiderman. All that fiery determination of a personality has to be good for something. When she asked me to go potty, I drug my feet, knowing that starting too early can turn into one big headache. When she realized that I wasn't going to be any help, she started asking her brothers take her. Since they never tell her no for anything, the dreaded potty training began.

Four kids are a lot of work, but these older boys are starting to earn their keep. Chalk one up for the school boys who passed Tess's first of many hours on the potty by sitting and reading to her. I still owe them. But I mostly credit one determined little girl, who now is dressing and undressing herself multiple times a day. I had no idea that started this early. Lord help me.

If you're new to this potty training thing, I'll have you know that there are no magic secrets or hard and fast formulas that work for everyone. Even if you saw it on Dr. Phil, it might not work for you. My earliest was trained right at 2, and a certain boy was definitely three before we could leave the house in undies safely. Every kid is different. But, certain things have worked for us. They may not work for you, but if you're desperate, you'll try anything, so I'll go ahead and share. :)

Here are my top five "what's worked for us" in potty training (I'm so loosing half of my readers right now... bear with me for the sanity of parents of toddlers everywhere!):

1. Don't start until your child shows signs that he is ready. It is tempting to start at a certain age, or when the peer pressure builds because every other mom in your child's class at church starts, but don't do it. You will definitely see signs to let you know that your unique child is ready to give it a go.

2. When you do start, commit to it. Don't start and then stop two days into it. I promise that this will confuse your child. Be consistent, be attentive, and just do it! Training is just that... training. Training takes time and practice, and won't be over in your timeframe (sadly). That being said, if you mess up #1, there's no shame in stopping, and starting again when the time is right.

3. Don't leave your house. I have found that starting on a week when I can stay home for several days straight produces the best results. With a busy schedule and changes in location, it is very difficult for a child to get into a potty routine. Don't add more expectations and stress to an already stressful situation. Oh, and don't plan on answering the phone that week! :)

4. Don't use Pull-Ups during awake hours. I may get some disagreements on this one, but for my kids, it was one more thing to confuse them. We used undies from the start, even when going out, so they could distinguish the need to stay dry. Now naps and overnight, on the other hand, totally acceptable in my book...

5. My favorite potty training secret? Let them go naked at home. You may slightly embarrass the Schwann Man and the Fed Ex guy, but trust me, they'll live to tell someone about it. For obvious reasons, my kids were way more aware of their need to go potty when they were exposed. Many ask if I cleaned up accident after accident using this method, and the answer is surprisingly no.

That is, of course, when I strictly adhered to points 1, 2 and 3.

And by the way, you have my permission to take a picture of that too. It may remind you of sweet victory, or it may come in real handy for their high school graduation open house...

Nine weeks down...

...and I'm out twelve bucks for all A's for these two school boys. They don't get an allowance or money for chores, but for lost teeth and all A's on their report cards...

...you bet yer bottom dollar.

Oh, and don't forget the occasional slip of a dollar bill from Aunt Steph for apparently no reason at all. I tell her to save her money for her own kids, but she never listens. She makes me look bad.

And yes, if you must know, I cried at both conferences. I'm really not this unstable. I am just overwhelmed at the goodness of God. I'm amazed that even when a boy is silly and social and forgets to bring his homework home from time to time, he can still sit still long enough to open his mind and earn all A's. And I'm passionate about a boy who had some social bumps in the road last year, who has worked his tail off and has trusted God daily to help him become respectful, humble and full of integrity in the classroom.

And then I lost it when Trey's teacher told me about her son who died in a car accident when he was 15. She reminisced about her boy for a moment, and I grabbed her hand and we both had a good cry. And then I decided not to get on Trey so much for forgetting his homework a couple of times.

Conferences are only fifteen minutes a piece. How I packed this much emotion into 30 minutes I'll never know. But if you're a mom, you know. Well, as much as I know, anyway.

They captivate us. They get into our hearts and change us and challenge us. They make us proud and keep us humble. They remind us what it's like to have childlike faith, and then sometimes they have more faith than we do. They're honest to a fault, if there was such a thing.

I am a proud momma this week. Not because they brought home all A's. But because their teachers see a difference in them. How I pray that they see a difference in all of us. Our mission this school year? To be a family who stands out for Christ. Not to be perfect, because that'll never happen, but to care about the things that really matter.

Loving God and loving people. It never gets old.

Cousins!

Two of our nephews spent the night last Friday night. Trey and Ben were preparing to head to Florida for the week with Grandpa and Grandma Fincher. Dalen and Jack had been talking about a sleepover forever. So, five sweet boys played like best buddies all night, and giggled themselves to sleep all in the same room. I love it that they're getting older - all about the same ages - and can make awesome memories together.

So this weekend, we're doing it all over again! Teresa and Stephanie's families roll in tomorrow night, along with GrandDad and Grandma Cain (and their new RV!). We're planning to freeze our tushies off, otherwise known as tent camping at Prophetstown. Actually, the boys and the daddies are planning on freezing, while the moms and little ones hold down the fort back at the house overnight. We'll all meet up during the day to hang out at the campsite, and explore Prophetstown a bit. We may even hit a Pumpkin Patch if we ever decide to get motivated. One thing's for sure, we plan to eat and laugh a lot!

It's Fall, ya'll!

Nothin' like a day at the farm to start the Fall season off right! Jim and Mardi Lehe recently hosted our little playgroup from church and treated us to a fun morning filled with animals, fresh country air, a hayride, and a picnic lunch under a shade tree. It was a dreamy Fall day for sure...

Ah, one day she'll be able to button a coat over her big belly. Maybe.

Aboard the hayride with good friends. (Why is it that my boy is constantly surrounded by girls?? Because he loves them so!!)

Tess and her sweet friend Gunnar.

You can tell Chase is the third kid. We opted to skip preschool this day so he could enjoy the farm with us. Oh my, Jack would have never missed a preschool day. It would have felt too much like, well, skipping (gasp!). Thank goodness for a third-kid perspective. Plus, who misses preschool when you've got the farm? :)

Sat so, so still on the hayride, taking it all in...

And I had to throw in our latest Fall food creation... a work treat for Tyler to ease the pain of working the weekend during such great Fall weather (or worse, working a weekend during football season!).

Loving Fall!

This kid...

... belted out a Natalie Grant song playing on K-Love today, word for word, and it might have been the sweetest thing I've ever heard.

Speaking of K-Love, he has a boy named Caleb in his Cubbies class at church, and every Wednesday night on our way out the door, he says to me, "Ca-wub is in my class Mom. His name is Ca-wub, not K-Love. You know that, right, Mom? You know, he's the boy, and not the radio??". Every Wednesday night, without fail.

That made me remember the time, a few months ago, when I caught him matter-of-factly rambling to himself in the van: "I.... don't like loud cars. I.... don't like driving. I... don't like people. I... don't like positive, encouraging K-Love".

I had his first Pre-K conference with his teachers this morning, and came out appreciating him in a whole new way. He's the middle kid at home, always trying his best to fit in with whomever will include him. At preschool, he's a four year old leader, everyone's friend, a girl chaser, smiley, expressive, smart guy, with his very own identity. He's not compared to anyone else. He's just Chase. And he's a teacher's dream come true.

Who knew?

I love that each of my kids has their very own personality. Strengths and weaknesses. Today I realized that in the busyness of the season (of the year, and in this season of my life), I've focused a lot on what each child needs, instead of who they are. Does that make sense?

So tonight, instead of keeping track of how much food was left on his supper plate...

I listened to him giggle while he told jokes to his big brothers in between bites.

I noticed that he calls his sister "Girl" way more than he calls her "Tess". It's an affectionate term, and he used it a lot while he played trains with her under the kitchen table while I cleared the supper dishes.

He fell three times in a row running through the house, bonking elbows and knees. He asked Trey to wrestle him probably four times after supper. He didn't cry any of those times.

He joined Jack, Trey and two neighbor boys in scooter races (on their bottoms!) down the driveway tonight. When he saw that the youngest friend was sad because he hadn't won yet, he purposely slowed down and let him beat him from then on.

He begged to read Joshua, our current nightly reading in the Bible. I'd skip many a night if it wasn't for his persistence.

Ends up he didn't finish his supper tonight. He got dessert anyway. I'm probably going to pay for that, but it just felt like the right thing to do...