Don't wait.

She screams when I lay her down for a nap now. Merry Christmas to me. She's getting wise in her old age of 2 1/2, and is one of my best manipulators yet. I will not be shaken (which I repeat three times while closing my eyes and clicking my heels...).

So let the blogging distraction commence. I'm a task-oriented kind of girl, and getting on task helps me to not be tempted to give in. So there. You'd think this would be easy by now.

There was a time when I thought that we'd get it figured out once and for all. Surely after our second (or third, or fourth) baby, we'd slide into parenting cruise control. You know, taking life in stride, not getting ruffled about things that make us uncomfortable and limit our adult lives.

Once upon a time I cared about things like cute matching outfits for events like trips to the Christmas tree farm. You know, for those Hallmark-looking photographs where children with sweet pink cheeks are behaving perfectly, and tilting their heads at all the right angles.

Somewhere along the way, in all of my parenting maturity (ha!), I realized that matching puffer vests do nothing to help an outing go smoothly. In years past, most likely someone peed in those matching pants, or threw up on their brand new coordinating sweater. Forget about the Hallmark picture. I just wanted a set of clothes that didn't stink the entire van up on the way home. But we trudged on. We kept trying. We learned to not take ourselves so seriously, and to add a lot of laughter a long the way.

We learned that memories are made in the moments, not in the outfits.

We let go of unrealistic expectations for our kids, and for ourselves.

We decided to keep traditions, even if they are a little bit of work, and they don't always go as planned. Because boys grow up and start to remember the best parts, and laugh about those little details that make us parents tired just thinking about it. Our trip to the farm this year? Pretty uneventful. Don't be surprised, ya'll. 'Tis the season of miracles. No one's outfits matched, and I didn't even get a picture with all six of us in it. I'm not even gonna lie... I couldn't find a pair of gloves for Tess, so I just grabbed an extra pair of her socks before heading out the door. Worked like a charm. And I almost didn't care what anyone thought. What a peaceful morning outdoors with the five loves of my life. I breathed in the fresh air, and it was almost as if God confirmed our craziness: "Don't wait until you think it will get easier. Just engage yourself in the moment that's called today. There's so much joy in the moment. If you think too hard, you just might miss it."

P.S. And... she's finally asleep. Sweet relief.

Trey is Eight!!

The December birthday boy always gets about three celebrations. Can anyone say overcompensation?! The first one is always a party early in the month, so he won't get missed around the holidays. The second one is on his actual birthday, when I send a birthday snack into school for his class, and we at least hit Chick-fil-A to recognize that we didn't forget his real birthday. And the third (or fourth or fifth...) happens during our Christmas get-togethers when we see our extended families. Geesh. You'd think he's special or something...

So a football party it was... and before the party started, he needed one special gift ahead of time so he could get in gear.

Jerseys all around, because when we say theme party, we mean it!!

The guests have arrived, and so have their game faces.

Make your own jersey. I'm sure every mom was so excited to see their boy's wet puffer painted shirt come home. Hey, if preschool can send home glittery, globby-glued messes, then so can I. :)

Showing off their newly molded mouthguards, thanks to Tyler's mad molding skills.

You know your boy is growing up when he gets an NFL grooming kit for a gift.

Very awesome, and very stinky.

Decorate-your-own football and helmet sugar cookies...

And Trey's one request... a game of football in the snow!

Happy Birthday to my sweet darlin', who lights up a room with his friendly personality, crooked smile, and sweet dimples. Every day is a little happier because Trey is in it.

Full house...

... full lives. Shoot, full hearts too. What a privilege it's been to open our home several times this month with the purpose of focusing our hearts on Jesus this Christmas, celebrating relationships, enjoying the magic of the season, and recognizing one December birthday boy who officially turns eight today!

This is your little intro glimpse into our lives these last couple of weeks until I have time to share some fun photos properly. You see, it's 1am, and I just finished classroom snacks for Trey's birthday, teacher appreciation snacks for Christmas week, and some un-iced sugar cookies for Trey's class to decorate at their Christmas party on Wednesday.

Whose idea was it to have a baby the week of Christmas all those years ago anyway?

Oh yeah, we weren't exactly thinking on that one.

Anywho... more to come soon.

After this girl gets some sleep and can think of something halfway intelligent to write...

Shutterfly to the rescue...

(This is us in 2008, trying to get a decent Christmas card picture. Smile... 'tis the season!)

I'm behind already. If you're a busy momma like me, you're probably wishing about now that God would miraculously add a few extra hours onto the end of each day. Seriously. I don't think there's a free day on our calendar for the rest of the month. At least it feels that way.

I have to admit that I almost scrapped Christmas cards this year. I'm quickly running out of time, and hasn't almost everyone had enough of my kids' pictures on Facebook anyway (uh, don't answer that)? Technology has definitely made it easier to stay connected throughout the year. But then I remembered my sweet Aunt Esther, who doesn't have a Facebook account. She writes me a note every year telling me how much she enjoyed my cheesy little family picture and Christmas letter. If for no other reason, I can't let Aunt Esther down.

And let's not forget how fun it is to be on the receiving end (please tell me you are as obsessed as I am)! Getting a Christmas card in the mail is like God's little encouragement to me for putting up with junk mail, a bazillion credit card offers and bills all year long. For nearly one whole month, I get to open my mailbox and drool over how cute other people's kids are and how much they've grown from last Christmas. Let's do this, people!

Short on time and ideas like I am this season? Shutterfly to the rescue. I'm super impressed with their selection of photo Christmas cards this year. It makes me happy that I can just pick the style I want instead of trying to come up with a design on my own (who has time for that anyway... and, if you're as artistically challenged I am, this will make you happy too). There are all types of styles to choose from. We are sticking with the one photo style card this year. Not necessarily because we're humble, but because one good shot - where everyone is looking and no one is picking their nose - is all you get with four small children.

While you're at it, make it easy on yourself and order matching address labels for your envelopes. Remember, this is the one time of year when we moms can try to pull off like we actually have our act together. Heh. And since you took all that time to coordinate outfits and bribe your kids into taking a decent picture (or so I hear that's what people do...), you should seriously display it year-round. I'm a huge fan of the new Canvas Wall Art from Shutterfly. I get tons of compliments on our canvas print. It's character makes it a clear stand-out from the rest of our wall hangings, and the quality makes it well worth the money.

So get on board this Christmas! For me, and for all of the sweet Aunt Esthers out there.

I'll be checking my mailbox every day in anticipation... :)

You'll never guess...

This is me, with my big sunglasses and my big mouth (yikes) smiling really big. Why, you ask? Because the tree was up Thanksgiving weekend. If you know Mr. Practical, that's good. Real good. We're still suckers for live trees. Yes, we know about fire hazards, bugs, babies who eat pine needles and daddies who step on them, but we can't seem to pull ourselves away from the great outdoors and our little family tradition.

I'm actually surprised that we're still this committed, considering our track record. Maybe we should be committed for continuing on with our little annual stream of bad luck. You see, we've been known for our trips to the tree farm in the past. The Lord uses memorable family moments like these to keep me humble, I swear. I get laughs every year when the season comes around and I mention that we're planning to head out to the farm again.

Remember this year, and oh yes... who could forget this one? Yeah. So glad we can entertain you with our quickly-becoming-predictable mishap stories. So very funny to you. Not funny to me until much, much later. And don't you forget it.

But we're sentimental little suckers, who nowadays are tipping the balance a lot closer to forty than we are thirty. Approaching mid-life and officially beginning to get stuck in our ways. Strangely satisfying if you must know.

So the tree farm strikes again.

What stories will it hold this year? Stay tuned, my friends. Stay tuned...

Dear November,

I thought we had a good thing going. I liked you and your short-sleeved shirt weather. We were good for each other. I thought the feeling was mutual. We had some great times together working, jumping, and playing. Life was simpler with you around. I want you and your beautiful colors back. Is that really too much to ask? Three rowdy boys like you as well. They need you almost as much as I do. They need to be outside to run fast, play hard, throw a football, and tackle in wide open spaces. They are longing for bike rides with neighbor kids, and fires in our back yard. They're lost without their daily collection of sticks, rocks, and small creatures (dead or alive, no matter). They just want some fresh air and to get a little dirty, for crying out loud. It all happened so fast. You were here, and just like a good cup of Chai that is empty before I know it, you were gone. I know, I'm getting a little sentimental in my old age. I know you have to go... I just wish you could have stayed around a little bit longer.

With much love and affection until you come again,

~Whitney

How I spent my evening...

"Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings." ~ William Arthur Ward "Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe..." ~ Hebrews 12:28

Going to bed... a little later than I had planned... but thankful just the same.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Thankful...

Tonight, I'm choosing to forget about:

The turkey sugar cookies...

The pies...

The Pumpkin Torte...

Doing something nice for my new neighbors...

The laundry that piled up over the weekend...

My lost cell phone...

Trey's not-yet-learned lines for his Thanksgiving play...

Traveling with a two year old this week...

The grocery shopping...

The Christmas shopping...

The Lego E-bay shopping... :)

And instead, I'm choosing to just sit still (well, as still as I get... poor Tyler, I take after my mother) and be thankful. Because if none of that other stuff gets done, no one will remember a year from now anyway.

But they might remember if I had a thankful heart.

Choosing to be thankful today. Because I have so very much to be thankful for.

And because being thankful is a choice.

"The Lord has done great things for us and we are filled with joy!" ~ Psalm 126:3

Friday nights...

This is how we spend most Friday nights now. Not that we were all that adventurous before kids, but still, we might have stayed out past 8pm. I remember when Tyler and I were living in Arizona early in our marriage, both working at a small retail pharmacy. It wasn't uncommon for us to put in 70 hours a week... a great excuse to eat out every night after we got off at 7pm. Sounds luxurious, until we remember how miserable we were. Even though I've only had my nails done twice in my life (one was on my wedding day!), I'd still choose a Friday night with Play-Doh stuck underneath my nails, including the one severely warped by a Chuck E. Cheese bathroom stall door.

Tyler and I were married four years before we had Jack. We're so grateful for that time that we took for each other, to work, travel, and enjoy a little more freedom (ok, a lot more!) than we have now. We poured ourselves into a decent social life and ministries galore. It didn't feel selfish to live that way at first. And then one day it happened. I remember telling Tyler that I was tired of my life revolving around me. Even though there were a lot of good things weaved into how we spent our days, we wanted to reach a little more outside of ourselves. We longed for a ministry a little bit closer to home.

There's no turning back when it comes to parenting. Friday nights will forever look different to us now. There are Friday nights that are full of contentment spent at home with our little ones. Then there are the Friday nights when we long for a little bit of peace and quiet and the chance to come and go as we please. We long for friends and restaurants with decent food. But thinking about how parenting has changed me, I would never want to go back.

I love this quote by author Elizabeth Prentiss. My challenge today for myself: to not spend too much time looking back, so much that I miss all that God has for me today...

(She had just found out she was expecting her third baby and was delighted. Her sister-in-law, however, had a different outlook; much like the one I can be so prone to have).

“She says I shall now have one mouth the more to fill and two feet the more to shoe, more disturbed nights, more laborious days, and less leisure or visiting, reading, music, and drawing. Well! This is one side of the story, to be sure, but I look at the other. Here is a sweet fragrant mouth to kiss; here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery. Here is a soul to train for God; and the body in which it dwells is worthy all it will cost, since it is the abode of a kingly tenant. I may see less of friends, but I have gained one dearer than them all, to whom, while I minister in Christ’s name, I make a willing sacrifice of what little leisure for my own recreation my other darlings had left me. Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mother’s heart, welcome to her time, her strength, her health, her tenderest cares, to her lifelong prayers!”(Stepping Heavenward, p.228-229)

Two are better...

This was my breakfast in bed last week... made by Mr. I'm-pretty-much-good-at-everything. The boys love it when Daddy's home to make breakfast. He always comes up with something new and creative and fun. And he even cooks to rockin' music and says, "Bam!" a lot when he flips his pancakes, which makes him cooler than cool in their book. He can cook, clean and even decorate better than me. When we first got married, his crazy amount of talent used to bother me. Our first fight was over a wall hanging, and whose creative eye was more, well... creative. Wasn't I supposed to be the one who excelled in homemaking? But I quickly learned that marriage is not a competition. God gave me this talented man to add to my strengths and help me in my weaknesses. And most of all? Through our relationship, to reflect Christ to a world that needs to see Him. And all of that domestic skill? I wish his momma was still around to thank for that.

One morning last week each boy trickled down one-by-one from their night's sleep - about fifteen minutes apart. So I was able to spend some rare one-on-one time with each of them. Tyler told me once that even when he was old enough to want a little space (ok, a lot of space) from his mom, he would always let her get close to scratch his back. Even though they still want me around every minute of their awake life, point well taken and tucked down deep in my heart.

So I scratched each back, and prayed for the young girls who will one day marry Jack Tyler, Trey Andrew and Chase Dylan. I prayed specifically, keeping in mind the personality of each boy. Each gift, and each quirk. The evident charming qualities, and, yes, the characteristics that will require much patience and forgiveness from a spouse. And I prayed that they would not take this decision lightly... the biggest decision they will make in their lifetimes, next to surrendering their lives to Jesus.

God knew that we'd have to forgive each other often, but He also knew I would appreciate things like an alphabetized spice cabinet and vacuum lines in V-shaped patterns...

I'm so glad He did...

All Dressed Up...

We don't celebrate Halloween. Or do we? Chase asked what there is to celebrate, and Trey told him that we celebrate getting candy. Sounds good to me.

And you need to know that there is a slight obsession with dressing up in our house. Not just on Halloween, but practically every day of the year. Our dress up bins are filled to the brim, and we like it that way. When Tess was born, the boys were so glad that she was a girl so they could finally add Tinkerbell to their cast. It's serious stuff when you play Peter Pan and there is no Tink. This boy needs to be an actor. Or maybe a youth pastor. I would like that. Or a car salesman. Something that puts all of that drama to work... I love this picture. Doesn't it look like it's out of a Pottery Barn magazine or something? Except for the fact that we pulled two outfits - already owned for quite some time - straight out of our dress up bin, and not purchased online for some insane amount of money. Pottery Barn magazines are not all bad, though. I'm getting quite skilled at flipping through them and getting all kinds of sweet ideas, only to replicate them at the clearance end-caps at Target. I'll have you know that my handsome husband chose to wear that puffer vest completely on his own tonight. See, I am rubbing off on him. :)

She really did have a good time... completely content to ride in the stroller and watch the boys go from house to house. She and I ended up heading back a bit early to the house to greet some of our own Trick-or-Treaters. The highlight of the night: when she spontaneously embraced Spiderman (another two year old, who was a complete stranger) for like two minutes straight. Counting the loot! Tyler is proud of our cute little tradition that he started: each kid writes in Sharpie on their plastic pumpkin their candy total for the year. So it looks something like this:

Jack - 2010 - 100 pieces.

Official totals for this year... Jack - 100, Trey - 101, Chase - 105, Tess - 2

I'd say in some small, happy way, that's reason to celebrate. :)

V-i-c-t-o-r-y

Yes, I am training my two year old "mommy" to capture precious moments... on the potty. It's a normal practice around here. You know you do it too. After all those years of changing diapers, you take pictures of your kids learning to use the potty. Not just because it's cute (even though it is). But because it spells V-i-c-t-o-r-y. And since there are so many days when we as moms feel less than victorious, we'll capture anything and everything that slightly resembles success. She's been potty trained since August, and it still feels surreal when I look at her cute little bottom in those pink Hello Kitty undies. Partly because she's wearing undies and not a diaper, and partly because they're Hello Kitty and not Spiderman. All that fiery determination of a personality has to be good for something. When she asked me to go potty, I drug my feet, knowing that starting too early can turn into one big headache. When she realized that I wasn't going to be any help, she started asking her brothers take her. Since they never tell her no for anything, the dreaded potty training began.

Four kids are a lot of work, but these older boys are starting to earn their keep. Chalk one up for the school boys who passed Tess's first of many hours on the potty by sitting and reading to her. I still owe them. But I mostly credit one determined little girl, who now is dressing and undressing herself multiple times a day. I had no idea that started this early. Lord help me.

If you're new to this potty training thing, I'll have you know that there are no magic secrets or hard and fast formulas that work for everyone. Even if you saw it on Dr. Phil, it might not work for you. My earliest was trained right at 2, and a certain boy was definitely three before we could leave the house in undies safely. Every kid is different. But, certain things have worked for us. They may not work for you, but if you're desperate, you'll try anything, so I'll go ahead and share. :)

Here are my top five "what's worked for us" in potty training (I'm so loosing half of my readers right now... bear with me for the sanity of parents of toddlers everywhere!):

1. Don't start until your child shows signs that he is ready. It is tempting to start at a certain age, or when the peer pressure builds because every other mom in your child's class at church starts, but don't do it. You will definitely see signs to let you know that your unique child is ready to give it a go.

2. When you do start, commit to it. Don't start and then stop two days into it. I promise that this will confuse your child. Be consistent, be attentive, and just do it! Training is just that... training. Training takes time and practice, and won't be over in your timeframe (sadly). That being said, if you mess up #1, there's no shame in stopping, and starting again when the time is right.

3. Don't leave your house. I have found that starting on a week when I can stay home for several days straight produces the best results. With a busy schedule and changes in location, it is very difficult for a child to get into a potty routine. Don't add more expectations and stress to an already stressful situation. Oh, and don't plan on answering the phone that week! :)

4. Don't use Pull-Ups during awake hours. I may get some disagreements on this one, but for my kids, it was one more thing to confuse them. We used undies from the start, even when going out, so they could distinguish the need to stay dry. Now naps and overnight, on the other hand, totally acceptable in my book...

5. My favorite potty training secret? Let them go naked at home. You may slightly embarrass the Schwann Man and the Fed Ex guy, but trust me, they'll live to tell someone about it. For obvious reasons, my kids were way more aware of their need to go potty when they were exposed. Many ask if I cleaned up accident after accident using this method, and the answer is surprisingly no.

That is, of course, when I strictly adhered to points 1, 2 and 3.

And by the way, you have my permission to take a picture of that too. It may remind you of sweet victory, or it may come in real handy for their high school graduation open house...

Nine weeks down...

...and I'm out twelve bucks for all A's for these two school boys. They don't get an allowance or money for chores, but for lost teeth and all A's on their report cards...

...you bet yer bottom dollar.

Oh, and don't forget the occasional slip of a dollar bill from Aunt Steph for apparently no reason at all. I tell her to save her money for her own kids, but she never listens. She makes me look bad.

And yes, if you must know, I cried at both conferences. I'm really not this unstable. I am just overwhelmed at the goodness of God. I'm amazed that even when a boy is silly and social and forgets to bring his homework home from time to time, he can still sit still long enough to open his mind and earn all A's. And I'm passionate about a boy who had some social bumps in the road last year, who has worked his tail off and has trusted God daily to help him become respectful, humble and full of integrity in the classroom.

And then I lost it when Trey's teacher told me about her son who died in a car accident when he was 15. She reminisced about her boy for a moment, and I grabbed her hand and we both had a good cry. And then I decided not to get on Trey so much for forgetting his homework a couple of times.

Conferences are only fifteen minutes a piece. How I packed this much emotion into 30 minutes I'll never know. But if you're a mom, you know. Well, as much as I know, anyway.

They captivate us. They get into our hearts and change us and challenge us. They make us proud and keep us humble. They remind us what it's like to have childlike faith, and then sometimes they have more faith than we do. They're honest to a fault, if there was such a thing.

I am a proud momma this week. Not because they brought home all A's. But because their teachers see a difference in them. How I pray that they see a difference in all of us. Our mission this school year? To be a family who stands out for Christ. Not to be perfect, because that'll never happen, but to care about the things that really matter.

Loving God and loving people. It never gets old.

Cousins!

Two of our nephews spent the night last Friday night. Trey and Ben were preparing to head to Florida for the week with Grandpa and Grandma Fincher. Dalen and Jack had been talking about a sleepover forever. So, five sweet boys played like best buddies all night, and giggled themselves to sleep all in the same room. I love it that they're getting older - all about the same ages - and can make awesome memories together.

So this weekend, we're doing it all over again! Teresa and Stephanie's families roll in tomorrow night, along with GrandDad and Grandma Cain (and their new RV!). We're planning to freeze our tushies off, otherwise known as tent camping at Prophetstown. Actually, the boys and the daddies are planning on freezing, while the moms and little ones hold down the fort back at the house overnight. We'll all meet up during the day to hang out at the campsite, and explore Prophetstown a bit. We may even hit a Pumpkin Patch if we ever decide to get motivated. One thing's for sure, we plan to eat and laugh a lot!

It's Fall, ya'll!

Nothin' like a day at the farm to start the Fall season off right! Jim and Mardi Lehe recently hosted our little playgroup from church and treated us to a fun morning filled with animals, fresh country air, a hayride, and a picnic lunch under a shade tree. It was a dreamy Fall day for sure...

Ah, one day she'll be able to button a coat over her big belly. Maybe.

Aboard the hayride with good friends. (Why is it that my boy is constantly surrounded by girls?? Because he loves them so!!)

Tess and her sweet friend Gunnar.

You can tell Chase is the third kid. We opted to skip preschool this day so he could enjoy the farm with us. Oh my, Jack would have never missed a preschool day. It would have felt too much like, well, skipping (gasp!). Thank goodness for a third-kid perspective. Plus, who misses preschool when you've got the farm? :)

Sat so, so still on the hayride, taking it all in...

And I had to throw in our latest Fall food creation... a work treat for Tyler to ease the pain of working the weekend during such great Fall weather (or worse, working a weekend during football season!).

Loving Fall!